Flash Fiction (a Hundred Words or Fewer) #61: Le Hoppy Merchant

Seeing that Jeff’s blog featured Le Hoppy Merchant, in which that black-and-white drawing of the yarmulked, hook-nosed, black-bearded Jew gleefully rubbing his hands together, a drawing the alt-right called Le Happy Merchant, had turned into a purple Easter bunny, with even the yarmulke and beard purple, reminded Taylor once more that the alt-right sucked.  As head of REAL (Republicans Everywhere Are Lit), an organization aimed at Millennials, she knew that reclaiming wokeness from the Democrats required an avoidance of stupidity and an embrace of inclusiveness toward everyone, even Muslims and Latinx.  (Plus that creep Jeff had kept hitting on her.)

Copyright © 2019 by David V. Matthews

Flash Fiction (a Hundred Words or Fewer) #60: Losers

“Men and women—both are losers.  Women adapt themselves to fill the needs of men, and men adapt themselves to fill the needs of women.”

So wrote Bernie Sanders in a 1972 essay about sex and gender.  He’s since repudiated the essay, and I can understand why; voters can’t take too much honesty.  Everyone’s a fake—well, everyone who wants society to operate smoothly.  Mutual phoniness preserves order.  Pretending I care about my husband’s fantasy baseball league, and his pretending to despise Trump—yeah, not quite equal, but since women live longer than men, I’ll cut my man a break.

Copyright © 2019 by David V. Matthews