politics – Page 4 – DAVID V. MATTHEWS

Flash Fiction (a Hundred Words or Fewer) #15: Showering

PornHole, my favorite Internet site for free smut, now offers nine different golden shower videos starring nine different Donald Trump impersonators. I don’t know who does the showering in these videos, because I’ve never watched them and shall never do so, not only because I voted for Jill Stein, but because depicting Trump as sexually-uninhibited pretty much normalizes him and his ultra-right-wing buddies. Plus he’s bragged about his carnal exploits. Not showing him getting any would piss him off more, no pun intended. (By the way, even radical guys such as me like jerking off. Even the revolution needs Kleenex.)

Flash Fiction (a Hundred Words or Fewer) #13: Sustainable Farming

Five minutes into my supervisor’s PowerPoint presentation, I wanted to beat the living crap out of him, meaning I’d grown more tolerant in my old age, ha ha, but not too tolerant.

God, what a liberal jackass—no one outside of wine-and-cheese parties cares about sustainable farming. I can’t wait for President Trump to stamp out this PC bullshit. If we didn’t alter the environment to raise crops, millions of people would starve. I dunno if Trump the real-estate guy knows anything about agriculture, but someone in his administration probably does. You can’t run the government with a narrow mindset.

Written on the spot

January 20, 2017