Flash Fiction #109 (Exactly 109 Words): Dog Crap

One day, as Jessie and I lounged around at home, listening to some news show on the public-radio station, the host said “A warning to our listeners: this story contains graphic descriptions of the physical and sexual abuse of children.”

“Gentlemen, start your boners,” I said.

“YOU SICK BASTARD!” Jessie screamed.

“Come on, they obviously want to attract listeners, or they wouldn’t’ve said that.”

Jessie—not yet my ex-girlfriend—calmed down.  You can’t joke about anything nowadays.  And since my parents had treated me like dog crap for most of my childhood—ah, who cares?  I care more that the news show host looks hot.  (I Googled her photo.) 

Copyright © 2021 by David V. Matthews

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