Either my Internet skills have deteriorated, or I’ve hallucinated the past. After minutes of intense Googling, I can’t find proof Steve Martin ever sang a song called “Grandpa Bought a Rubber.” I could swear I’d heard this song during my childhood—well, not the actual song, but my classmates singing it at school; my parents forbade me from owning Steve Martin albums or any other adult cultural products, searching my bedroom regularly for contraband and beating me if they found any. However, decades later, my mother died from colon cancer, and my father died from liver failure, so, yay, revenge.
Copyright © 2019 by David V. Matthews