In That Bicentennial Year

(Note: either gender can sing this song.)

Your love was thick
And I swallowed it whole
Then you zipped up your pants
While we listened to soul

“Good thing I saw Deep Throat”
Was my witty remark
Then you asked me to leave
So I left for the park

But I started to sob
When I got on the street
The folks who walked past me
All looked down at their feet

In that Bicentennial year
I had TV, not T. Rex
And wished we could take off our clothes
Whenever we had sex

Red, white and blue
Were the hues of the year
But your face was just red
As you dry-humped my rear

Then I lay in your arms
You were more than a chum
I told you I loved you
You said “Don’t be so dumb”

In that Bicentennial year
I had TV, not T. Rex
And wished we could take off our clothes
Whenever we had sex

In that Bicentennial year
I watched Gumby, I watched Zoom
I watched Tennessee Tuxedo
Top Cat and Romper Room

To me your couch
Was both heaven and hell
We never got off it
It soon started to smell

What we had, fizzled out
’Round the Fourth of July
I found a new lover
And I stopped coming by

I can still see your couch
Its spilled beer and crushed food
Oh, and in case you care
I’ve had sex in the nude

In that Bicentennial year
I had TV, not T. Rex
And wished we could take off our clothes
Whenever we had sex